Often forgotten parents: child decency education

By: Ustadz Iwan Januar (Writer, trainer Islamic parenting)

" golly man, I've seen Mr. John Doe's son, he watches a korean band on youtube," a friend's story. When you touch gadget, it's like you can't escape. Included the youtube channel. When Mr. John doe is known as the activist. There's another story, there's a boy who's used to yelling at the parents including opa and omanya, even with harsh words.

Attitude or attitude & manner of children don't seem trivial. Some of the old people are ignored by planting manners for children, more focused on children's academic abilities such as science lessons or memorizing the Qur ' an. There's an impression that manners on the child will form itself. Cook yes penghafal the Qur ' an has no decency?

Reality is not proportional to a person's academic achievement, including by religious learning. In the life of our adults repeatedly seeing people who are intelligent in Islamic knowledge, to rule Arabic, memorize the Qur ' an, master he, but it is a hipster. He refused and abused him. Like there was a young boy in the land of the water that since the age of childhood has become a hafiz, but refusing to be the child of Islam and the duty of caliphate

In History we can read a figure like hajaj ibn Yusuf, a ruthless governor in kekhilafahan yazid. History has recorded it as an unjust guardian and an enemy of the scholars, while he was the scholar of tabi 'in, priest said bin musayyib rahimahullah, penghafal the Qur' an and not rarely cries in their

Then don't ignore manners for our children. Adab is not a natural thing for children when they memorize hadith, memorize the Qur ' an or learn to be harmed. But it needs understanding and conditioning of both parents.

The scholars of the salaf were very concerned for their children's cultivation before other religious knowledge. Then the scholars always put adab in the beginning of study before demanding another science. Imam Darul Hijrah, Imam Malik Rahimahullah once said to a youth quraysh," study adab before studying a science."

Adab is an original form of personality after actuality a Muslim, while science is his body. Abu Zakariya Al-' said;

" Science is like a fire without firewood, and decency without science like the spirit without a body."

The scholars of the salaf believed that from the private children and civilized teenagers, then the religion of religion and the world would be easy to reach Instead of a student who rules the religion and the world, without manners, then their science will not bring barakah.

What can an old man do so that the Muslims have the sublime decency?

First, after instilling faith in Allah's faith. (Muhammad), he is the one who loves his servants. See if a respectable Muslim is like saying polite, honest, listening to old man's advice, want to share, it will love God Almighty.

Second, treat children with a moral and compassion. Reduce their scolding, denouncing and humiliate them. Call them with affection and praise like ' Saleh ' or ' Solehah '. The Parent s' treat is a savings of information and decency to the hearts and minds of children.

Three, hit it in proportion, don't be wasteful, and look at them. It's important to first tell me what to do and what is not bolehdilakukan. At Pre-puberty they don't know that yelling at others is no good. For them it's a natural response. Then tell them how to say good to others, especially to parents.

Fourth, be a parent responsive is not a reactionary. Is sensitive to good and child mistakes. Don't let the child be dragged into such an error like hitting friends, grabbing toys or food, immediately responding well. Tell and prevent to happen again. In order that children often appear to be unresponsive to the actions of a bad child. They shut up or consider it natural. Understand, kids like trees are gonna grow up. When the boughs are young, it's easy to be formed, but when it's big, it's hard to do that.

Fifth, make good manners as a habit in the family. Old parents say soft, not yelling, not rude, not insulting, happy to embrace, praise and easily forgive child mistakes. This onboarding will make an easy boy to do it when they grow up.

Sixth, a lot of praying. Allah is the all-Mighty, the all-wise. Do not only pray that our children are clever and class champion and easy to memorize, but ask God for our children to be decorated with his noble moral character.

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