Saturday, November 11, 2017

LDR in marriage, shall we?


By: iwan januar

The marriage unites two couples in one life, also one roof. But sometimes there are conditions that can make a partner have a relationship with LDR, long distance relationship, aka long-distance relationships.

A variety of conditions that make a couple of husbands and wives will have to run the wedding models of There is something due to the question of the service of service prohibiting the wife of the wife, it could be because a husband or wife is still in college, or can also not find a suitable home to
LDR condition in marriage must be carefully reviewed and carefully, of course with Islamic glasses. Every couple of husbands should have to bind themselves to the laws of syara ' in all things, including in this relationship of LDR.

Not because many couples do an LDR, then be seen and can. There is a consideration that should be judged in the standpoint of law syara ', because for every Muslim action (Hasan) or blameworthy (Qabih) is according to Allah swt., not our own volition. Syara s' rule says:
The good is good and the ugly, what is his rule

That's admirable is what syara ' has praised, and despicable it is what syara ' has panned out
Therefore let us review the law of syara relation to the spouse of islamiy's husband. LDR in his legal household jaiz / can with record as follows:

1. is done with no pressure from any party, except for his husband and wife. For example, they both agreed to do an ldr for a long time because the husband had to follow an education program or kedinasan that didn't require to stay in the dorm, or If there is a party that is intimidated by a couple of husbands, so that he may cause you to be disobedient.
2. during ldr living and the inner of husband to wife keep running. Such as shopping money is sent to wife and child, and periodically they can meet so the inner child remains fulfilled. Usually a husband comes home every week or follows the pjka pattern (home Friday back Sunday), although there is also a month once, etc.
3. Andaipun is not able to provide a living, but the wife ridlo with this state, then ldr can be. For example, in case they are still in college and the husband has not worked for a while, then both parents are still willing to spend their money, the law Of course it can't go on permanent, the husband must remain berikhtiar for a living because the law of syara requires it to be the backbone of the family
4. During LDR, neither husband nor wife should be able to defend yourself with Islamic Islam, especially in social society. Husband must maintain modestly, self-respect, by not fraternizing with the opposite sex. The same wife. If there is a matter of household, then be done together, do not be unconcerned with the non-concern, especially voiced on social
5. If the wife who asks for his ldr for the cause of college or work, or for wanting to survive in the home of his parents, while the husband is not ridlo, then In this case the wife is considered bermaksiat for not being obedient to her husband.
Obedience to a husband is mandatory for a muslimah while getting married. This subject can be reviewed in a state of Hadith of a woman who obeys her husband. Even when his parents died, he still didn't see them, because he kept obedience to the husband. When the messenger of God sees. Heard about it, he complimented that last one.
Then a wife must obey wherever her husband goes. Even if it had to be a bit homesick for both parents, or might have to leave a career or ladder. God willing, God will open a mercy for them. And a good husband will give his wife a chance to go back in their place.
However, even if the conditions are met does not mean ldr forever mubah. There may be a condition in which an ldr must end. The emergence of the marriage is one of the strong reasons for up ldr. For example, a wife has exhausted the household and take care of the children, then the presence of a husband. Or for example, the children are beginning to show an Islamic personality because of the factor factor, or the lack of Father's role, then an ldr must be
Reality shows not a little couple of husbands who then disperse because they are not able to serve the relationship of LDR. Some are still running ldr but with hobbled because it felt heavy with the various that happened. It's more tragic that there is a frustrated husband / wife who finds his partner an affair as long as they have a
Life's life is a shared life, a husband, a wife and a child. The law of syara ' has decreed that each has the right to be granted.
And women are equal to what is right. But the husbands have a degree above his wife; and Allah is all-Mighty, all-wise. Al-as [2]: 228).
Messenger of God. Also said:
And for yourself is right and you are right
Surely you have the right to be granted, and in your family there is a right. Muslims).
Well, the blessed wives of God, when you walk a household with an ldr pattern, evaluasilah home travel all this time. Husbands and sons, and the children of their wives.
You must be patient, if you must have an ldr for a reason. But if you are compelled to walk, you will have no faith. Obey and join the husband in a new place. Prophet. Said:
" if you're married And she said, "yes, he said," it's your paradise and your fire
" do you have a husband?" she said, " indeed, he is your paradise and yours." Al-Hakim.
May Allah be with all the Muslims, tie their hearts to their families, and maintain the law.

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